Okay so you've all heard my rant about my least favorite class.
This is ranting about yesterday.
So part of the rules in the costume shop is no inappropriate shop talk as well as no excessive talking or singing. Yeah no singing period. (but we bend the rules a bit and sing softly when some people aren't there. Advanced students warn us when we are singing too loud but at least they are nice about it.) Anyway. Inappropriate shop talk. Limited swearing, nothing about sex or the like, alcohol or drugs or whatever. It does happen and we to get warned or chewed out about it. It depends upon who is telling it to you. Now the advanced student the costume shop manager and one of the other professors are really nice about it. Even when they are stressed. However there is one instructor who give me the impression that she is high and mighty. Anyway I was talking about a Rocky Horror callback with a couple people that went and saw the show on Halloween. It had to do with a butterfly masturbating. So I tried to keep my voice low but apparently it wasn't low enough because not a moment after she screamed INAPPROPRIATE SHOP TALK and proceeded to bitch me out about how it was inappropriate. Well one I was trying to keep my voice low so she wouldn't hear, two I honestly didn't think that I would get bitched at for that, three she bitched to me in such a tone that I really wanted to say fuck you to her. No really I wanted to scream fuck you to a teacher for overreacting to a small little indiscretion. Apparently she was stressed out. That does not give any one a reason to bitch out someone for a minor mistake. Yeah were all guilty of it but being stressed over something or other does not give ANYONE the reason to get angry at someone else for any reason. Now this isn't the first time I've wanted to yell fuck you to her. Now one of my biggest issues is when I am working on a project (sewing painting drawing or what have you) I tend to like to have conversations with my fellow peers. Now usually I keep my eyes on my work as I work but there are some times where I do like to make eye contact with whomever I am talking to. Apparently I talk a lot. I hate silence sometimes. I vocalize my thoughts as I work sometimes (about what I am working on) and apparently I was doing it to the point where I had to be shushed. Now I try not to talk too much but if someone talks to me I am going to respond. Now it wasn't the fact that I was shushed that bothered me (because I don't usually have a problem with that) Its the way she shushed me. There was such a bitterness to her tone that I really felt a sting come from her words. It wasn't like a small sting this was one of those "I'm going to chew you up and spit you out" sort of stings. Now I don't know what is going on with her what her family is like or why she is the way she is. All I can say is she gave me the impression that she was high and mighty and extremely prude. NO I do not use prude in a very nice sense. I felt like I gravely offended her with my one stupid comment about a call back that is used during Rocky Horror. I wasn't talking about sex or masturbation itself. So now when I am in lab I might as well just keep to myself shut up and not say a word to avoid having her be a bitch if I do something that SHE doesn't approve of.
I guess it is still frowned upon to think outside of the box and be a little creative or unusual according to some people. I suppose that censorship rules above all else even in theater.
Now there is another thing. Since when did theater have censorship! The costume shop and costuming and any tech work is a part of theater. Now it is my understanding that in theater there are not comfort zones no wall no boxes. So if someone is working in a theater, whether it be costuming, lighting or what have you, for a show it seems so wrong that talk needs to be limited to PG-13. Because god knows something could go wrong and someone will yell FUCK at the top of their lungs because of an injury a mistake or an accident. Or some people could be talking about a hot steamy night off in a corner in a low tone so people don't overhear. God forbid that someone can't have a conversation as they work.
I'm sorry I'm still really pissed and hurt that one person threw innocent words with such spite at me because I made one little slip up. Fuck I cried for about an hour last night because I was so hurt by her tone. I know it seems childish to cry over something so small but when someone figuratively whips you with such a sting you kind of want to break down and cry from it.
I do not understand what her issue is or if she has to have control over her environment. But it hurt and really did make me feel like I was a useless nothing and that I didn't belong there among them.
Yeah...
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