Defensive

So...when I feel like I am being attacked verbally...I tend to get very defensive and I bust my ass to prove my point. I'm all for respecting other peoples opinions but not when they are being a blunt ass about it. It's a fault I have really. I'm very very sensitive when it comes to the way you say something or the way you word something and it is difficult to keep my emotions in check. I mean yeah I've always had difficulties with that but sometimes when I feel so strongly about something and I post it because it helps me get out my feelings I always get comments on my facebook about the opposite side of my opinion and they generally sound like assholes.

My policy is if you are an ass to me or if you treat me like I am stupid or if you say something to me in a rather condescending tone then I will bite back.

People know that I can bite back and I do. I can bite hard and sometimes...most of the time really I feel like such a fool that has wasted energy on a cause or a belief that no one else understands or cares about as much as I do. Even if it is minuscule it may have a certain impact on me that is greater than they can see and when a thing like that is shot down in my face and stomped into the ground in front of me...it hurts...because maybe it inspired me or maybe it lifted my spirits or changed my perspective on something...sometimes things impact me in a way that other people cannot see or hear or fathom. And maybe it is my own damned fault for getting so attached or close to an object or theme or what not but sometimes that is how I function. And sometimes people just don't get it.

I get defensive. I know I do. And I bite back when I feel like I am being attacked. Its a natural...base instinct that I am programmed with. Yeah it is feral and animalistic but that is how it is.

Now it is not nearly as bad as it once was...but I still struggle with it.